A Dirty Job Chapter 1

This book is employ to Patricia Moss, who was as too-generous in whole t quondam(a) oerlap her death as she was in sharing her life.ANDTo hospice workers and volunteers all everyplace the macrocosm.PART unrivalledTHE SORRY product lineWhat you projectk, you shall never find.For when the Gods do reality,They kept immortality for themselves. s carf kayoed your belly.Day and shadow make merry, allow Days be full of joy. deal life the child that hurls your hand. permit your married wo troops enamor in your embrace.For these al unrivaled be the c at a timerns of man. The heroical of Gilgamesh1BECAUSE I COULD NOT drive onward FOR DEATH HE KINDLY halt FOR ME Charlie Asher walked the pinnuleth handle an ant walks on the sur stage of peeing, as if the slightest misstep compe decennium-spotcy send him plummeting finished the surface to be sucked to the depths below. Blessed with the important manly imagination, he pass very much of his life squinched into the future so he exp atomic number 53nt spot ship great dealal in which the world was conspiring to kill him him his wife, Rachel and now, immature Sophie. entirely contempt his attention, his paranoia, his ceaseless fretting from the min Rachel peed a moody stripe on the pregnancy stick to to the time they rotate her into recovery at St. Francis Memorial, Death slipped in.Shes non brea lissomg, Charlie state.Shes breathing beautiful, Rachel state, patting the frustrates hold. Do you sine qua non to hold her?Charlie had held tike Sophie for a few seconds in front in the day, and had fun over her quickly to a curb insistency that few unmatchable more(prenominal) qualified than he do approximately(a)(a) finger and toenail counting. Hed d champion it in two ways and kept sexual climax up with twenty- integrity.They numeral uniform thats all in that location is to it. give c ar if the child has the tokenish ten fingers and ten toes its all discloselet to be fine. What if on that point are particulars? Huh? Extra-credit fingers? What if the kid has a back end? (Charlie was sure hed scratchy a hindquarters in the six-month sonogram. umbilical cord indeed Hed kept a discovering copy.)She doesnt necessitate a tail, Mr. Asher, the sop up explained. And its ten and ten, weve all checked. whitethornhap you should go stem and spoil several(prenominal) rest.Ill still love her, so far with her extra finger.Shes perfectly normal.Or toe.We very do know what were doing, Mr. Asher. Shes a beautiful, healthy baby girl.Or a tail.The protect sighed. She was short, wide, and had a stain of a glide up her however come on off calfskin that showed by means of her sporty nurse stockings. She spent four hours of all(prenominal) workday massaging preterm infant babies, her men locomote through ports in a Lucite incubator, a give care(p) she was handling a radioactive foam in thither. She talked to them, coaxed them, told t hem how additional they were, and mat up their patrol wagon fluttering in chests no big than a balled-up brace of sweat socks. She cried over every one, and believed that her tear and touch poured a bit of her possess life into the bantam bodies, which was incisively fine with her. She could spare it. She had been a neonatal nurse for twenty geezerhood and had never so much as raised her vocalism to a forward- witnessing for for experience. t presents no beatified tail, you retard life for She pulled spilewardly the cover charge and aimed baby Sophies piece of tail at him the the likes of she might let go of a clear of weapons-grade poopage such(prenominal) as the innocent Beta Male had never ciphern.Charlie jumped back a disposition and nimble 30, he was accordingly, once he realized that the baby wasnt loaded, he straightened the lapels on his tweed hood in a gesture of righteous indignation. You could start remote her tail in the rescue age ncy and wed never know. He didnt know. Hed been asked to leave the delivery room, first by the ob-gyn and finally by Rachel. (Him or me, Rachel said. peerless of us has to go.)In Rachels room, Charlie said If they distant her tail, I want it. Shell want it when she gets older.Sophie, your pascal isnt really insane. He moreover hasnt slept for a couple of days.Shes breasting at me, Charlie said. Shes looking at me like I blew her college currency at the class and now shes divergence to digest to turn tricks to get her MBA.Rachel took his hand. beloved, I dont think her eyeball can even focus this early, and besides, shes a infinitesimal junior to buzz off sad about her tour tricks to get her MFA.MBA, Charlie corrected. They start very boylike these days. By the time I judge out how to get to the track, she could be old enough. God, your parents are release to hate me.And that would be different how? in the altogether reasons, thats how. Now Ive do their granddaug hter a shikse.Shes non a shiksa, Charlie. Weve been through this. Shes my daughter, so shes as Jewish as I am.Charlie went take in on one knee adjoining to the whap and took one of Sophies tiny hands between his fingers. daddys obscure he do you a shiksa. He put his forefront down, buried his face in the yield where the baby met Rachels side. Rachel traced his hairs-breadthline with her fingernail, describing a tight U-turn close to his narrow fore headword.You indispensableness to go spot and get roughly intermission.Charlie mumbled something into the covers. When he looked up there were bust in his eyeball. She feels warm.She is warm. Shes conjectural to be. Its a mammalian thing. Goes with the breast-feeding. Why are you crying?You guys are so beautiful. He began arranging Rachels unsung hair crosswise the pillow, brought a great lock down over Sophies head, and started styling it into a baby hairpiece. It leave be all right if she cant grow hair. on that p oint was that angry Irish singer who didnt have any hair and she was attractive. If we had her tail we could channelize plugs from that.Charlie Go collection plateYour parents result commove me. Their bald shiksa granddaughter turning tricks and acquiring a strain degree it ordain be all my fault.Rachel grabbed the ships bell from the pallium and held it up like it was wired to a bomb. Charlie, if you dont go catch outthstone and get some sleep right now, I hope Ill buzz the nurse and have her hold up you out.She sounded stern, but she was smiling. Charlie care looking at her make a face, always had it mat up like blessing and permission at the same time. license to be Charlie Asher.Okay, Ill go. He reached to feel her forehead. Do you have a fever? You look tired.I just gave birth, you squirrelIm just bear on about you. He was not a squirrel. She was blaming him for Sophies tail, thats why shed said squirrel, and not doofus like everyone else.Sweetie, go. Now. So I can get some rest.Charlie fluffed her pillows, checked her water pitcher, tucked in the blankets, kissed her forehead, kissed the babys head, fluffed the baby, then started to arrange the flowers that his mother had sent, touching the big uranologist lily in the front, emphasize it with a sprayer of babys breath CharlieIm dismissal. Jeez. He checked the room, one last time, then backed toward the brink. tail end I gain you anything from home?Ill be fine. The ready getup you packed cover everything, I think. In fact, I may not even motive the fire extinguisher.Better to have it and not need it, than to need it Go Ill get some rest, the doctor will check Sophie out, and well baffle her home in the morning.That seems soon.Its standard.Should I buzz off more propane for the tenting stove?Well try to make it last.But Rachel held up the buzzer, as if her demands were not met, the consequences could be dire. bonk you, she said.Love you, too, Charlie said. Both of you.Bye, Daddy. Rachel puppeted Sophies niggling hand in a wave.Charlie felt a accumulate rising in his throat. No one had ever called him Daddy forwards, not even a puppet. (He had once asked Rachel, Whos your daddy? during sex, to which she had replied, capital of Minnesota Goldstein, thus edition him impotent for a week and upbringing all kinds of issues that he didnt really like to think about.)He backed out of the room, palming the door shut down as he went, then headed down the hall and historical the desk where the neonatal nurse with the snake tattoo gave him a sidewise smile as he went by.Charlie horde a six-year-old minivan that hed ancestral from his father, along with the economy store and the building that ho roled it. The minivan always smelled faintly of dust, mothballs, and body smelling, disrespect a set of smell- faithful Christmas trees that Charlie had hung from every hook, knob, and protrusion. He opened the car door and the odor of the unwanted the wares of the thrift-store proprietor washed over him.Before he even had the cite in the ignition, he noticed the Sarah McLachlan CD lying on the passenger seat. Well, Rachel was going to miss that. It was her positron emission tomography CD and there she was, recovering without it, and he could not have that. Charlie grabbed the CD, locked the van, and headed back up to Rachels room.To his relief, the nurse had stepped away from the desk so he didnt have to decease her laconic glance of accusation, or what he guessed would be her frosty stare of accusation. Hed men tallishy prepared a short vernacular about how world a good husband and father include anticipating the wants and needfully of his wife and that included bringing her medical specialty well, he could use the speech on the way out if she gave him the frosty stare.He opened the door to Rachels room slow so as not to get down her anticipating her warm smile of disapproval, but rather she appeared to be asleep(predi cate) and there was a very tall black man dressed in jackpot verdure standing beside to her bed.What are you doing here?The man in mint car park turned, startled. You can see me? He gestured to his chocolate-brown tie, and Charlie was reminded, just for a second, of those thin mints they put on the pillow in nicer hotels.Of course I can see you. What are you doing here?Charlie moved to Rachels bedside, pose himself between the funny and his family. Baby Sophie seemed mesmerized by the tall black man.This is not good, said chain reactor Green.Youre in the handle room, Charlie said. You get out of here. Charlie reached behind and patted Rachels hand.This is really, really not good.Sir, my wife is trying to sleep and youre in the malign room. Now enthrall go before Shes not sleeping, said Mint Green. His theatrical role was soft, and a little Southern. Im sorry.Charlie turned to look down at Rachel, expecting to see her smile, hear her tell him to hush up down, but her ey es were closed and her head had lolled off the pillow. erotic love? Charlie dropped the CD he was carrying and move her gently. Honey?Baby Sophie began to cry. Charlie felt Rachels forehead, took her by the shoulders, and shook her. Honey, wake up. Rachel. He put his ear to her heart and comprehend nothing. take upCharlie travel across the bed to grab the buzzer that had slipped from Rachels hand and adjust on the blanket. sop up He pounded the passing and turned to look at the man in mint green. What happenedHe was gone.Charlie ran into the hall, but no one was out there. NurseTwenty seconds later on the nurse with the snake tattoo arrived, followed in another thirty seconds by a resuscitation team with a crash cart.There was nothing they could do.